Self-observation – practical division/Meditation

In next few articles I will share my version of the methods for self-observation, specifically – protocols that work for me. These methods are an amalgam of other people’s practices and modifications as a result of my personal experience. They are simple but require consistent practice, in other words – discipline. It is important to like them or to enjoy the challenge to practice them and to tailor them to your needs. 

The first method is meditation.

There are numerous myths about meditation, different types of mediations and a good deal of meditation classes which leave us very confused whether to meditate or not and if we meditate whether we are doing it right or not. 

Let’s start from the beginning – some general rules. The ultimate goal of meditation is to nurture our wellbeing and to reduce or stop our suffering. Self-observation is part of this process of knowing ourselves, our bodies, our thoughts, our emotions and our habits. The most important principles of self-observation are: it is non-judgemental and does not require action following the insights it delivers.

I practice transcendental mediation – or, should I say my version of it. I researched thoroughly for a while and found out that this type of meditation best suits my personality and my needs. It works for me. 

Here is my transcendental meditation protocol:

1. The meditation pose

The pose is sitting and comfortable. The sitting position gives the right balance between focus and relaxation and with practice you will start to feel this balance. The same applies to comfort – find a sitting position that feels good and relaxed – for example, your usual position for watching television, a position in which you like reading books, support for your back, a position with crossed legs, etc. 

                                 

 

 

 

 

 However, do not be limited by the pose. You can meditate when you walk along the beach, lake, through the forest or park, when you are in the garden, etc. 

                                 

2. Length of meditation 

I do 20 mins meditation. I time it by using a cooking gadget or my phone. At the beginning you may feel that the session is too long, you become restless and want to stop. If 20 mins is too long try 10 mins and gradually increase the time. 

3. Time

I practice meditation straight after waking up, before drinking my coffee or before looking at my phone. When we sleep our subconscious is alive and working. It makes connections and creates patterns that we are not aware of. If you meditate after wakening you may become clear about what you learned when you slept. Believe me, it works. You will be surprised by the results. Useful solutions and creative ideas will come to you easily.

                                                       

Meditation can be practiced at any other time if it suits your lifestyle and daily schedule better. Sometimes I meditate in the afternoon and also feel the benefits. 

4. Other conditions 

  • silence – personally I prefer a quiet place for my meditation – my home, my garden, park or forest
  • eyes closed – I also prefer to close my eyes but it is entirely up to you

4. Process of meditation

  • start by sensing your breathing, gently inhale and exhale, without controlling your breath.  
  • try to relax your body as much as possible by breathing into it  
  • start repeating the sound “Ah-hum” in your mind. The vibrations of this sound helps to settle your  mind. 
  • your mind will wander and you will find yourself engaging with your thoughts.
  • if you notice that your mind wanders and you are engaging with them, stay passive, just return to sensing your breath and repeating the settling sounds. 
  • gradually you will lose awareness that you are meditating. 
  • do not get up straight after the mediation time is over, sit for a while, listen to your body, listen to your mind and then off you go. 

The most important thing –  you will start feeling the benefits of meditation NOT during the meditation time but during your daily life. 

They will come in two ways:

  • you will notice that the universe comes to you – you will have great ideas, inspiration, creative suggestions that come to you from “nowhere”, you will feel calmer, more focused, more content , etc. 

                                     

  • other people, especially people who know you – family, friends and colleagues, will give you feedback about the positive changes they see in you that you haven’t even noticed. 

Lastly, my honest advice – do not waste your money on meditation gurus, or meditation classes. All you need is to find a time (10-20 min) every day to practise meditation. If you are still not sure how to meditate there are so many guided meditations on the YouTube channel you are spoiled for choice. 

I recommend reading the book “Bliss More” by Light Watkins. It was very useful for me when I was creating my meditation practice. Maybe it will help you too. 

Self-observation


The season “The lost art of observation” has its first post about self-observation.

The concept of self-observation is self-explanatory: we watch and listen to ourselves, we watch and listen to our thoughts, feelings and behaviour.  
Why? I offer a very simple reason – because we need  to collect data about ourselves. We do not need to do anything with this data. Just collecting it changes us.
The art of self-observation has been lost because we do not practice it. We spend most of our lives on autopilot. The autopilot mode consists of our habits. When we are in autopilot mode our mind is not focused, it wanders. A recent study showed that people spend nearly 47% of their waking time in mind wandering, in other words – not thinking about what they are doing. Nothing wrong with that. We make more than 35,000 decisions a day so the autopilot mechanism helps enormously to live a comfortable life. The paradox is that the autopilot (our habits) make our lives easy and unhappy. Studies have discovered that when the mind wanders two things happen: we think about the past or we  plan the future.  And by doing that we become unhappy. So no surprise that so many mindful practices exist to keep us in the present.
 
 
As any art, self-observation is an activity that requires creative skills, practice and is based on some principles. In this post I will outline the principles of the art of self-observation  based on the book “Self-observation” by Red Hawk. 
 
 
 
1. Self-observation is non-judgmental. We do not classify, we do not conceptualise. We do not want to understand our past, why we are the person we are, why we are not as others. No! We just watch, listen, allow, accept. Whatever we observe – emotion, thought, action – we stay neutral. It is not at all easy to do it but it gets better with practice. 
 
2. Observing the object. In other words , we do not change the object of observation – we  do not engage with our thoughts, feelings or behaviour when we self-observe. The mind has a very specific characteristic – a thought appears, followed by another one , and another one, a chain of thoughts and feelings  and we find ourselves fully immersed in them. That is not self- observation, as the object of observation has changed. Again it is not easy to stay in line with this principle but practice makes us better. 
 
 
3. Sensations in our body. One very useful thing to remember is that the body and mind are interconnected and observing the sensations in our body not only collects data but keeps us in self-observing mode. We are observing the bodily sensations as well as our thoughts, emotions and behaviours. 
 
 
4. Honesty. Be brutally honest with yourself. We all want to look good in front of other people. We pretend, lie or suppress our manifestations. Self-observation requires honesty, the raw truth. It may cause pain but watching the pain, without interfering helps to transform it. Emotions are energy and the body knows how to deal with the energy, how to use and transform it. 
 
So, as a result of self-observation we gain some insights and these insights are about our habits.
What we do with these insights is up to us. We may choose to do nothing. Very good – the actual process of self-observation has already changed us, or at least our attitude to the habits. Or maybe we will choose to do something with the insights we have gained – establish new habits, change habits, break habits. 
The next post in this season is about the protocol of self-observation. 

Dopamine – the molecule of motivation and desire to pursue more Part 2

It is worthwhile using the knowledge of the powerful molecule of dopamine and its working mechanism to better our daily life. 
Again, as in Part 1 of the “Dopamine” post I base my suggestions on the podcasts of Andrew Huberman, a Professor of neurology and ophthalmology at the Stanford School of Medicine. Many of you have heard of  these practices/protocols, tried them or use them regularly. They work! They will work even better if you modify them to suit your personality and ability and to stay flexible in their implementation.
 
1.The first protocol is very simple, free and has proven useful in my own experience. You already know that dopamine is released even in anticipation of an event. If you engage your mind to rehearse your actions with excitement and anticipation, the dopamine will be released as a result and motivate you to really get into action. You just need to be very thorough, to go through the details of the motion, step by step. For example, if you need to study but cannot make yourself open the book just imagine what you need to do in complete detail: – getting up and sitting at the desk, opening the textbook, finding the subject chapter, starting to read and understanding the text, enjoying the reading etc. 

You can use this protocol for everything you want to do but just cannot find the motivation. If you want to do some running  but cannot make yourself to do it – imagine you are getting up from the sofa/bed, putting on your fancy sport gear, then the trainers, then the fancy sports watch, setting it up, go out, starting running, enjoying it and feeling great. I used to practice that with my running, now I am applying it to my yoga sessions and it works every time.

 
2. Having cold showers. Actually, not only cold showers but also swimming in cold sea, plunging  in cold bath, going to a spa equipped with Scandinavian cold water baskets etc. I have been practicing having cold showers for more than 18 months now and cold showers are part of my morning routine. I start with a warm shower and the last 1.30-2 mins I turn the tap to cold. I like having cold water all over my body including my head but it is time consuming to dry my hair afterwards so I take it as it comes – flexibility is the key. 
The benefits are tremendous. I feel energised, my body feels strong and capable, I have a clear mind and I am calm and alert. The dopamine euphoria lasts approximately 2-3 hours. Delicious! It does not matter how cold the water is and how long you stay in it, as long as it is safe and you feel the benefits afterwards. Nothing dangerous or silly must be attempted. 
 
I initially heard about the cold dopamine therapy listening to a podcast with Wim Hof (The Ice Man).  His life and achievements are incredible and you can read his life story online. He seems a very charming, convincing and good-hearted man. I have been using his app to guide my cold shower practice and breathing techniques for  more than a year and find it very useful. 
Of course, you need to be aware that you will feel the shock of the low temperature every time you go into the cold water, regardless of how long you have been practicing. But that has very positive side effects – it teaches you to face challenges and to stay calm under pressure. If you do not fancy doing this alone there are local groups that practice swimming in cold water, I personally know a local group of women swimming in the sea called “ The Blue Tits”. It sounds like great fun. 
3. And the last of my protocols for dopamine benefits is intermittent fasting. Firstly, if you recall, regular end rewards actually kill the enjoyment of the activity. Secondly, after every dopamine peak there is a dopamine low. So I practice skipping some rewards. It is the same as being hungry – If you were hungry the food you put in your mouth is delicious, tasty and gives you pleasure. Thirdly, novelty and surprise lead to a huge dopamine release. Giving yourself less rewards, employing novelty and surprise, works not only to release dopamine and motivate you but also helps you to maintain the baseline dopamine level in your body or even to increase it. Sounds counterproductive but it works in reality. I like fashion and buying clothes is one of my rewards for good achievements. However, I often avoid  giving myself this reward. My focus is on enjoying the work, the creativity, the challenge. I am saying to myself that I  am not there for rewards, I am there because I like what I am doing. If the rewards comes, that is even better. 
I remember one morning when I was doing Ashtanga yoga. There is a pose called Parivritta Parsvakonasana (Revolved Side Angle Posture). It was not only difficult to pronounce, it was always difficult for me to do and to hold it. I was very tempted to skip it as it was too hard. And then the thought appeared. – It is hard exactly because I need to do it, I need to work on it, not to avoid it. Facing the challenge to try to hold the posture also gave me enjoyment and excitement.The motivation I received from this thought helps me in many other situations when it is hard. If it is hard it is because we have the pleasure of challenging ourselves to make it easier with practice.